Accountability and Affirmation, Baby Version 2.0

Oh. Hello.

You know, I've missed the blog. I spent some time the other night reading old posts and reliving some of those memories. Pretty nuts.

So I guess the most obvious question would be, "Why haven't you written if you missed it? Couldn't you just write and then not miss it?"

To which I say, that's a fair point.

I guess the most obvious answer is the dramatic lack of conflict from my life in the months since I last wrote. I typically like to write to exorcise, you know, feelings. And I mean, the desire to exorcise good feelings just isn't that strong, you know?

I'm 30 (I know right? What the fuck.), and I'm more content than I've ever been -- for a lot of reasons. The lovely Lola (aka Emily haha) re-entered my life last spring, and it's been a whirlwind of awesome since. The friends with whom I debauched previously are more settled, too.

In short (LULZ, yeah right, BG), writing things like, "Today I felt good," over and over wasn't as appealing.

And so I guess the second most obvious question would, "Why write now then?"

To which I say, suck on it and like it. I don't know! I just felt like it. Whatevs!

OK there's sort of a reason. One of the main things I wrote about was my weight-loss odyssey. Well, I'd like to restart it. When you're in a happy relationship, and you're content and satisfied, I think the natural tendency is to slide a little. You eat out a little more. You eat a few more cupcakes than you should. Etc. Etc.

Did I undo everything I worked so hard for two years ago? No, no, no. I put back a few pounds though, like you do, and I'd like to unput them back on. So I figured, why the eff not. It helped last time. Let's give it another go.

So what's the plan?

Well, I have a new job (HEY OH), and my office building has a full gym in it with treadmills, free weights, weight machines, etc. Free access to a full gym? Sold. I'm planning on three days of weights and three days of running. I'll stick to the treadmill for now because it's the dead of winter and PASS on running outside when it's colder than 50.

Sound good? Good.

And of course I'm hoping for plenty of pithy posts, containing too many sentences begun with conjunctions. Because that's how I roll.

Who knows -- maybe I'll even write something some of you find entertaining from time to time. But don't hold your breath, AMIRITE. I'm so rite.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? You know where to find me.

-BG

Hey. Thanks.

Yeah. I know I'm a couple weeks late on this, but Thanksgiving happened while I was on my blog vacation. Naturally, I have some thoughts.

It's no secret 2011 hasn't been my best year -- although it did rally something serious starting at the end of October. Well, when you go through rough times, you learn a lot about yourself and your friends and the people who care about you.

I've definitely got that. I learned more this year than I ever have before -- about humility, about perseverance, about trusting my instincts, about not being afraid of accepting help, about the importance of a positive attitude, and so on and so on.

Finally, I feel like I've made it through the storm. I feel so good, and there are innumerable things for which I'm incredibly thankful. Since I didn't write anything on Thanksgiving, I figured why not now?

Fair warning, though. It's about to get real up in this piece. So in the spirit of Thanksgiving (two weeks ago), I couldn't have made it through this year without the following things (some very obvious, some maybe not so much), albeit it an incomplete list:

My Family -- My dad slipped me a $20 bill every time he saw me. My mom sent me home with food every time I saw her. My grandfather was so upset when he heard about my job back in January, he sent me a card with a check for $50 in it. Seriously. That happened. Is it getting dusty in here? I mean. There aren't enough words.

My Friends -- You guys. For reals. You're all ridiculous, and I don't know what I would have done without our weekly (or more often) debaucheries this summer and fall. You were there with a kind and encouraging word when I needed it and with a disparaging word when it was necessary haha. And you continue to be awesome.

Fridays at the Bottom Line -- The best happy hour in DC. It's tough to beat the $1 beer specials. We can go in there and all get drinks for like $25 total, which would cover like three drinks anywhere else in the District. Many a ridiculous night has originated at the Bottom Line, and I hope for more to come VERY shortly. Like this week, I hope.

Running -- Reluctantly crouched at the starting line. Engines pumping and thumping in time. The green light flashes. The flags go up. Churning and burning, they yearn for the cup. You're fired up right now, aren't you? The first few lines to "The Distance," by Cake. It's the first song on my running playlist every time I run. Since April, when I started watching what I eat and exercising intensely, there have been times where I was simply overwhelmed. And nothing cleared my head, got the blood pumping or burned the energy better than a solid four-mile run. Whenever I go a few days or weeks without running, that first run back is a rush of excitement, and I always remember how much I love it now. It's so funny because I hated running until I forced myself into a half-marathon two years ago. Since then, I've run two 5Ks, and I registered for a second half-marathon here in DC in March. CAN'T WAIT.

Losing Weight/Being Healthier -- You may have heard, but I've lost more than 40 pounds since April. You know what never gets old? I wore pants yesterday I couldn't even pull up to my waist just a few months ago. Never mind buttoning them, I couldn't even get them up to my waist. And I wore them comfortably yesterday. Incredible. I was wearing XL shirts just eight months ago. Now, I wear mostly mediums. I have a size medium coat. What in the world. This time last year? I was almost 230 pounds. I weighed in Monday night after my run at 186, which is even more of an accomplishment given how I spent the months of October and November up and down the East coast. More on that next week.

Dancing -- Dude. I never knew how much I loved it until this past summer. But, man, what an unbelievably freeing and exhilarating time. Play a little Jackson 5 ("I Want You Back," especially) or, really, any 60s music, I'm totally in. Oh who are we kidding...I'm good with anything. Lulz.

My Job -- First and foremost, I straight-up love my co-workers. You guys are brilliant and hilarious, and I could not be more excited about this opportunity. It challenges me in new and exciting ways every day, and I'm learning something new seemingly by the minute. What more can you ask for?

My Best Friends -- Jon, you are like a brother to me. We've been friends for, what, 17, almost 18 years now? Incredible. You have a way of cutting right to the point in exactly the way I need to hear it exactly WHEN I need to hear it. I often, unwisely, do not heed your advice (just as we both know I probably won't this time...LULZ), but, rest assured, I know I probably should haha. And it is always most appreciated. Sometimes I just need to go down magnificently in flames, consequences be damned, you know? C'est la vie. And Mike. There may be no stranger "bromance." Despite the fact that we have only hung out in person maybe four times total, I don't think it's an exaggeration to say I have talked to you more than anyone else this year. Disturbingly parallel. Whatever happens with one of us, I can know without question the other has either already done it or will be doing it shortly. Lulz, indeed.

Last and, most certainly, not least, the past five weeks -- I mean. What can I say? Simply amazing. Thanks, "Lola." Always.

-BG

What's Next

Oh boy.

Seriously. I am the exact opposite of Peter from Office Space right now. Every day of my life is better than the day that came before it. Every day you see me or talk to me is the best day of my life. Life is so, so very good!

I have been giggling like a school girl for almost three solid days now. I love everybody! This is pretty much an exact replication of how I reacted on Monday after hanging up the phone upon receiving my offer:

Not Gonna Cry
Jerry Maguire at MOVIECLIPS.com

YEEEAAAH BUDDY.

What's Next?

Well, tomorrow is my first day of work. God I really can't wait. CAN'T WAIT. I am going to dominate so hard.

I immediately canceled my move-out notice, and I will sign a new lease tomorrow. I know I may need to move at some point, but honestly, I can't emphasize enough how much I don't want to worry about that right now. Baby steps. One thing at a time. I like this apartment a lot, and the commute isn't going to be that much longer than when I rode the Metro. At worst, if the commute sucks, I'll deal with it for a while, and then look at some other living arrangements then.

I can finally book my flight for Boston next month now that I know from what city I'll be flying. A bunch of us have tickets to the State/BC game -- a true battle of who could care less, to quote Ben Folds. But nonetheless, it'll be an awesome trip with both DC and Raleigh friends heading up there. Plus, I have a cousin who lives nearby! Gotta go get down in Beantown.

While I plan on waiting and getting settled at the job before I do anything, I will absolutely begin my search for a band to join with MUCH excitement. I'd like to see how the first few weeks at work go, but I will be crafting my Craigslist ad before too long! Hell, I may just post the blog post I wrote about it over the summer.

The biggest challenge will be holding onto my fitness and eating habits while working all day every day now. I'll just have to wake up early enough to walk Allie and run or hit the gym before I leave. I just so much prefer to work out in the morning than in the afternoon. I love the feeling of an awesome workout, but I like to get it out of the way and feel the energy rush throughout the day. Like today, I ran four miles this morning, and I've felt awesome all day. Although there are certainly extenuating circumstances for that as well! LET'S GO.

I'm going to have to work hard to maintain my food discipline, too. I'll need to bring my lunch a minimum of three days a week. Since hitting 185, I've lost hardly any weight at all. Some of that is due to fun trips to Raleigh and Charlotte, to be sure. But I've also noticed my pants getting looser and looser in the interim. So it's not all that I'm not losing weight. I could just be toning and tightening up. I mean, geez. My new 34"-waist jeans that I was so excited about just a month ago were LOOSE on me last week, despite holding steady at around 185. What in the world!

I'll need to get my old dog walker back on retainer, too. There are going to be nights where I don't get back until later than Allie is used to. But she really seems to like the woman who's walked her in the past, and she's not too unreasonably priced, so it seems worth it. She'll come walk Allie for 30 minutes or so and feed her for me. Not bad at all.

So the blog. Obviously, I won't be able to devote time during the day to writing anymore. Honestly, I cannot believe I've managed to keep up with posting three times a week since early June with very, very few exceptions. I have no intention of stopping now either. I've gotten into a rhythm, and I really enjoy writing for whomever decides to stop by and read. What I plan to do now is write my posts the night before and just post the link during the day. I'm sure the new blog routine will take some getting used to, but it'll work out just fine.

Weekend Roundup

You may have read about my less-than-awesome drive last week. Turns out I completely busted BOTH wheels on the passenger side of the car. The car place ordered one wheel because they didn't know both were wrecked. The back wheel was wrecked on the inside, which they didn't know until they took the wheel off. To which I'm compelled to ask, "Why didn't you do that before ordering parts?" But I digress.

They called me on Friday to say it would be done by closing. Then they called 20 minutes later to tell me about the second wheel. The second wheel was supposed to arrive on Monday. It did not. The guy at wherever they were getting it from somehow failed at putting the wheel on the UPS truck, and it didn't arrive until Tuesday afternoon.

Anyway, the rest isn't that important. Both wheels eventually arrived. Both tires eventually arrived. And everything was put on the car. A good time was had by all.

I finally got home last night around midnight. What a week.

Oh and Kirk and Liz's wedding!

Wow what an awesome wedding. Incredibly beautiful and unique location. Excellent food and dancing at the reception. Old friends I hadn't seen in forever. The unbelievable experience of seeing my old friend Paul dance. I've never seen someone control a dance floor like he did Saturday night. It was really something to see.

I've got nothing else. I'm so incredibly giddy right now. Tomorrow's drive in the morning rush will be the best drive in the history of mankind. I can't wait!

Next time we speak, I will no longer be unemployed. GREAT SUCCESS.

LET'S GO!

-BG

North Carolina

Sorry for the missed post yesterday. I spent pretty much all day driving to Charlotte. And then since I'm driving to Raleigh tomorrow, I probably won't post tomorrow. So this will be all this week. But! I am hoping to acquire enough material this weekend for some really great stories next week. I'm also hoping I'll be able to share that material publicly. We'll see how that goes haha.

I think it'll be worth it.

Anyway. If you're reading this, you probably know I was born in New Jersey. Northeast New Jersey to be exact -- approximately 20 minutes from New York City.

My family lived in New Jersey until I was 11 years old. In 1993, my dad took a job in Charlotte, and we moved away. It was devastating at the time, but that's a story for another day.

I consider myself a northerner. I always have. If you listen to me speak, you'll undoubtedly hear twinges of a northern accent. It's inescapable. Two years ago, my brother and I were driving to New Jersey to visit some family. We stopped at a toll booth, and the toll operator said hello, and I responded, "hey how you doin?" I didn't think anything of it. I didn't say it in an unusual way -- it was just the way I say things.

When we pulled away, my brother looked at me and goes, "Jesus, what's up Vito? What the hell was that?"Apparently, it came out in a very thick northern accent. I didn't mean to! It's just the way I speak.

And, of course, most of my favorite sports teams are New York-area teams. New York is my favorite city in the country. Etc., etc.

The point is, I self-identify as a northerner. I always have, despite having lived in North Carolina for 15 of the past 18 years -- more than half my life and more than the time I spent living in New Jersey.

The past two years, however, I've lived in the DC area -- definitely NOT the south. And now that I'm away from North Carolina, I find myself missing it more and more the longer I'm gone.

I guess I shouldn't find that to be so strange. I did almost all of my actual "growing up" in North Carolina. I went to middle school, high school and college in North Carolina. I worked in North Carolina. Almost every significant life event of mine up until now happened in North Carolina.

It's tough to explain. After spending so much time in downtown DC over the past couple of years, it just feels dramatically different being in North Carolina. I'm certainly not going to make any claims about one being better than the other or anything like that. That's ridiculous and pointless.

But I know I feel good when I'm in North Carolina. It feels like home to me. The air feels and smells different -- especially in the fall. The pace is certainly more in tune with my easy-going, laid-back nature (although I do really enjoy the faster-paced DC lifestyle). Also, they have sweet tea here. Everywhere.

I'll always think of myself as a northern guy transplanted to the south. But being away for the past couple of years feels like it has drawn me closer, and I miss it. Don't get me wrong: I love living where I live, and I don't intend to move away. Despite my intensely laid-back and relaxed nature, I feel like a city guy. So DC is extremely appealing to me.

But you know. North Carolina has its advantages, too. Especially this time of year. The humidity is fading, the air will be turning crisp and the leaves will start to turn soon. Fall in North Carolina is some kind of special experience. And the football. I have no problem admitting this: there is nothing like experiencing college football in the south. It's just different here. Definitely better, and that's factually correct.

So yeah. I'm pretty excited to be spending the next several days back home in North Carolina. I'm super pumped about spending time with friends I haven't seen in way too long. It just feels good here, man. I like it.

Brief Weight-Loss Update

I weighed in at 185 today before running, which is a loss of 42 pounds. I'm only 5 pounds away from my original goal weight. Incredible. I can't believe how far I've come. I can't believe how good I feel. I'm not going to say I look good, but I will say plenty of others say it for me and to me, and goddamn THAT feels good.

I can't imagine I'll stop at 180 when I get there. I haven't checked since last week, but my body fat percentage was still hovering around 22 percent -- down from more than 30 percent back in April. But I'm not satisfied with 22 percent. I want to get to 17 percent, ideally, but definitely less than 20 percent. Keep on truckin', my friends. No choice.

I ran another four miles today, and it was my best four-mile time ever. I did it in 36:38 this morning -- just more than a 9-minute mile pace. I don't have a stopwatch or anything, so to keep track of my pace, I have a playlist of running songs. I note the time of the song that's playing when I reach each mile marker, and then I figure it out when I get home based on how much time elapsed on the playlist.

So today, it went like this:

Mile 1: 8:31
Mile 2: 8:51
Mile 3: 10:46
Mile 4: 8:30

Mile 3's time is dramatically higher because I walked for around two minutes when I reached the two-mile turnaround point. The last quarter-mile or so of mile 2 was straight uphill, so when I got to the two-mile point, I gave myself a breather. After walking briefly, I picked it up again and ran the entire way home.

Some perspective: last year at this time, I needed more than 32 minutes to finish 3.1 miles. This year, I finished four miles in just more than 36 and a half minutes.

It's been a good day. Love seeing progress on the scale, in how my clothes fit, in the mirror, in my fitness level and running ability. I just can't imagine feeling better physically than I do right now. But I know I will as I keep this up.

And then combine that with going out with some of my oldest friends tonight -- some of whom have known me since I was 11 or 12 years old. And then this weekend of debauchery in Raleigh? Oh my god. You know what's coming now.

Man, let's GO.

-BG

Wisdom Teeth Surgery Made Me Feel Like The Godfather

This story is dedicated to my friend Jon, who will be having his wisdom teeth removed next week. Fear not, good buddy. I had a relatively easy time of it. Read on and relax!

It started during my sophomore year of college. Well the pain started then. For as long as I can remember, my jaw always clicked when I had to chew anything large or tough (i.e. a bagel or pizza crust, etc.). But my sophomore year of college, it really started to hurt.

I went to the dentist, and they did their X-rays. There was no discernible reason for the pain, except that it might be my wisdom teeth trying to come in. He wasn't 100 percent sure that's what it was because they were particularly impacted yet, but it wouldn't have been unheard of for that to be the cause.

I wouldn't say I'm scared of surgeries. I certainly don't care for them. I mean, who does? But I know a couple things. One, if you're undergoing some kind of surgery, anesthesia is usually involved. Two, anesthesia often makes people sick enough to vomit.

I do not vomit.

So I wasn't nervous about the surgery itself or the potential pain involved. The thought of possibly vomiting though -- couldn't handle it. Full of nerves about that.

We scheduled the surgery for May, right after I got back home from school for the summer to give me plenty of recovery time. My parents took me to the surgery since I wasn't going to be able to drive due to be under the influence of some heavy painkillers (more on that later).

I got into the back room, and they were getting the IV ready. Now, in addition to being, well, unenthused about the idea of vomiting, I am also less than fond of needles and shots (despite having a tattoo and wanting another).

The IV definitely made me more nervous than anything. The nurse gave me a stress ball to squeeze to get my veins pumped up for easy access. She stuck me with the needle, and I hated every second of it. I know it doesn't hurt that much -- it's just a mental thing I've had since I was very young.

She said to start counting backward from 100, and I don't believe I even started to say the first number before I was out.

I don't remember being woken up at all. The next thing I remember is the nurse helping me down the hall to my parents. Apparently, I was very concerned about a bad dream I had while I was out. I do not recall any of this, but I had a nice discussion about it with the nurse, according to the nurse.

Anyway. So the nurse helped me into the hallway to my parents. My parents got me into the car, and here's where things got interesting.

I mean, to say I was feeling good is a huge understatement. I don't remember what the specific painkillers were, but the David After the Dentist Youtube video is pretty accurate.

For me, it was less confusion over whether or not I was taking part in real life -- it was more I thought I was Don Vito Corleone.

The situation was compounded by the massive amounts of gauze I had to keep in my mouth for various reasons. So I was sitting in the car with my jaw jutting out because it was stuffed with gauze, and the painkiller haze filling me with absolute glee. Trying to talk like Don Corleone was a very natural next step.

It was then I proceeded to give my father several offers he couldn't refuse. And although Don Vito didn't say it, my best advice of the day was telling him to leave the gun and take the cannoli.

Well, at least I thought that's what I was saying. Turns out what I was actually doing was mumbling incoherently because the drugs had robbed me of my senses.

The only reason I know what I was saying is because, somehow, my mother understood me. There's just a biological link between mothers and children that obviously never goes away. I'd say something, my dad would look at me, dumbfounded, and my mother would answer me.

At that point, he'd look at her and say, in his understated way, "How the fuck did you understand what he just said?" To which she'd say, "You mean you didn't understand what he said?"

"No, of course I didn't. He's mumbling incoherently."
"Oh, I understood everything just fine."

Well then.

Some version of that continued for the rest of the drive home. I'd mumble something in my Don Corleone character. My mother would laugh. My father would be exasperated until she translated for him. I know beyond doubt they absolutely regret not having a video camera on that drive home.

To my everlasting delight, I never experienced any of the nausea of which I was so nervous before the surgery. I was still confined to soft foods for a few days. KFC mashed potatoes, ice cream and ginger ale ruled the house for quite some time after that.

I never experienced any significant pain or swelling or sickness at all. The worst thing I had to deal with was the annoyance of not being able to eat what I wanted. Also, the dissolving stitches they used. As parts of the stitches dissolved, other parts would detach and just hang free in my mouth.

Again, nothing painful. It was exactly what was supposed to happen, but man it annoyed me.

Oh, and there were holes in my mouth where the teeth used to be. I had to fill a syringe with a salt water solution to rinse them out after every meal. Let me tell you. That got old with the quickness. I say syringe, but I didn't have to inject anything anywhere. It was more to direct the water flow where I needed it to go. (Sorry that's a little gross, but it really wasn't as bad as it might sound.)

Within a few weeks, I was back to eating whatever I wanted to eat. The stitches dissolved and disappeared. I stopped needing to rinse my mouth after meals.

And, what do you know, the pain stopped. I guess dentists know something after all.

All that is to say this: Jonny, don't worry. It'll be fine. The worst thing I can say about my wisdom teeth surgery experience is it was a moderate annoyance. No pain, no swelling, no sickness, nothing really all that negative. It will be just fine!

So there you go.

Some miscellany, briefly:

• I weighed in at 188 again today, which is a great relief after this weekend haha. I'm loving running more and more every time, and I'm going to transition to a Tuesday, Thursday, Sunday running schedule since the half-marathon training schedule I use calls for Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and long runs on Sunday. I will be ready this time.
  
• And the rib is FINALLY painless! Completely painless! First time in five weeks! So that means back to the gym for some weight-lifting. Let's go!
• Our new softball league starts with a doubleheader under the lights tomorrow night! We have games at 9 p.m. and 10 p.m. CAN'T WAIT. New rule this season: no diving for balls.
  
• I'm planning on going to Charlotte on Wednesday morning for a couple of days before heading to Raleigh on Friday. Charlotte friends, holla!
• RALEIGH ON FRIDAY! I haven't seen some of you in entirely too long.

Life is so, so good, friends. Let's go!

-BG

Accountability and Affirmation, Baby Part 4

I mentioned this briefly last week, but it warrants repeating: 2011 has been one of the most challenging years I have ever faced.

Almost everything that could go wrong has gone wrong and in spectacular fashion. For the first few months of the year, I let it all get to me. It was awful. I felt awful. I didn't want to do anything. I didn't do anything. Again, awful.

Since then, however! World of difference! The way I have lived since mid-April is the reason I can't really say this is the worst year. It hasn't been THAT bad, really, aside from, you know, one glaring thing. And the job situation.

In the end, I have my health. That's more than a lot of people can say. Not only do I have my health, but I'm healthier and in better shape than at almost any other point in my life. And oh boy have I been working on my health.

So! This morning, after walking Allie but before running my four miles I weighed in at 190. AFTER the run, I weighed in at 188, but running four miles will lead to some water weight loss and not actual weight loss. Still, it's pretty fucking amazing to be within shouting distance of the 180s, which I have not seen in at least five years. Especially considering I was within shouting distance of the 230s just a scant four months ago. *Shudders*

Anyway, I will say I'm officially 190 now. Incredible. I'm only 10 pounds away from the goal I set for myself. I've lost 37 pounds! That's ridiculous!

When I really started to get going with this, my friend Mike told me I'd get down to my goal weight and then not want to stop. He went through a similar weight-loss at one point, and he said he ended up losing another 20 or so pounds after reaching his "goal."

Well, I have to agree. Don't get me wrong: I am super pumped about everything -- the way I feel, the way I look, how great I've been at watching what I eat, how I've been able to keep up with my gym routine. Great success. But I still have eyes. And I can look down and see what's still remaining. I've still got 10 pounds to go before the goal weight, but I might want to go another 10 or 15 below that. We'll see!

So here's my belt. Four months ago (and for a couple months before that), I was regularly using the second-to-last hole on the right (i.e. from needing a bigger fucking belt). Now? I'm on the last hole on the left (i.e. from needing a smaller belt)!!

And I'm going to need a new belt soon! This one is still OK for now, but there's room to spare when it pull it all the way to the last hole. Maybe I'll make my own hole there before I buy a new one. But you know. BOOM. Feels good, man.

You know what else is awesome? I'll tell you. Do you know what an Adonis belt is? Well, you know the muscle lines that begin right at the hips and slant down and inward? I HAS THEM. Well, I have the beginnings of them haha. In my life, I've never seen these on myself before, so this is pretty huge breaking news.

It's when you see visual evidence like that that reminds you why you're doing this -- nothing better. I've talked about it before, but it feels like a shot of adrenaline. It is AFFIRMATION, BABY. You know you're doing something right, and it's worth all the work and discipline. My God is it ever worth it.

One of the regrets I had was I never knew what my body fat percentage was. Well, this weekend I finally bought a scale that also calculates body fat percentage. AND I found a formula online that calculates body fat percentage based on your body mass index (BMI). Well, the website where I track everything, sparkpeople.com, has a handy tool where you enter your height and weight, and it tells you your BMI.

So using the formula, I figured out I had a body fat percentage of approximately 30 percent when I was 227 pounds. Now, I have no way of knowing how accurate that is, but as a ballpark starting point, it'll do. What that means is 30 percent of my body weight was fat. Gross. Man.

After I ran today, I stepped on my scale. Body fat percentage today? 22.5 percent. I've cut 7.5 points off my body fat percentage in four months. The American Council on Exercise has a guide for what a person's body fat percentage should be. For guys, obese is 25 percent and up. Average is 18 to 24 percent. Fitness is 14 to 17 percent.

Obviously, when I started, I was firmly in the obese category. I mean. Yikes, you know? I've moved myself down into the average category now, so that's awesome. Ideally, I'd like to get to 15 or 16 percent. After the past four months, I think I could get down to the athlete category (6 to 13 percent), but that just doesn't seem like much fun. I'm Italian, man. I gotta eat some fun food every now and then.

If I can get to the fitness category, I think that'll do just fine for me. But we'll have to see how it goes, of course. If I get down to 175, 170 or 165, and I'm happy with how I look and feel, then that's cool, too.

So yeah, it gives me another metric to use to track my progress, and I'm thoroughly excited about that.

Also, I've taken to running outside again. I've been sticking to the treadmill for a variety of reasons. But Saturday, when we were getting the outskirts of Hurricane Irene, it was so pleasant outside. A cool breeze and a cool, light rain. It felt so good. It was ideal for running in the rain, which is something I've found I quite enjoy, unless the temperatures are in the mid-50s like for my half-marathon.

And I did. I ran four miles on Saturday evening, and it was the single most enjoyable run I've had in a long time. It just felt so damn good. Also, last year, I ran a 5K in my neighborhood. Like, I could walk to it. Well turns out, that 5K is this coming Saturday. My friend Laura was talking to me about wanting to run in a 5K in her hometown, and it reminded me of this one. So I registered for it!

Now, since I've been running on a treadmill for a few months, I figured I should run outside for a little while just to make sure it's not a shock. I ran four miles on Saturday and four miles today, and I'll run another four miles on Wednesday. Then I'll take a break and just wait for the Saturday-morning race. CAN'T WAIT.

A couple other things:

• I spent much of Sunday downtown with Matty P. We went to lunch at Chipotle and then saw Harry Potter 7-2. Loved the movie, but I'm a big HP fan. At Chipotle, for the first time ever, I could not finish my burrito. I ate two-thirds of it, and I just couldn't do any more. My stomach is shrinking I guess, right? Hell, I'll take it. I do find I just don't feel the need to eat anywhere close to as much as I used to. Who loves it? THIS GUY.
  

• Sadly, what was once my favorite T-shirt for just hanging around the apartment or running errands has now become rather billowy on me. I'm shrinking, and the shirt is too big now. I'm running into this problem a lot more often lately. #humblebrag

• Tattoo update: If you've stopped by my Facebook wall, you've seen a multitude of friends expressing support for getting the Italian translation of "Let's go!" (Andiamo!) as my next tattoo. I spoke to my friend who is fluent in Italian, and she said the Google Translate version of "Keep calm, and carry on" is technically correct, but because of the phrasing, there's really no way to capture the meaning exactly. See? This is why I asked someone who knows the language. And you know what? I don't hate "Andiamo." My Raleigh friends and I say "let's go" all. the. time. It's an expression of excitement, optimism, glee and just generally feeling really fucking good. And honestly, it's much more my personality than "keep calm, and carry on." Like I said last week, nothing is imminent. Just thinking things through.

That's all I've got for now! As always, check back on Monday, Wednesday and Friday for new posts. I've done a pretty solid job of keeping to that schedule for a while now, and I don't anticipate stopping.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who stops by and takes the time to read, send me messages or post comments. I love each and every one of you for it.

-BG

Updates!

I wrote entirely too much last week. I wouldn't be surprised if most people didn't even bother to read it all. So let's just update a few ongoing things, shall we? We shall.

Ribs Update

Shit hurts, man. It's improving daily, but you know. I'm over it. I sneezed twice this weekend (BREAKING NEWS!), and the good news there is they didn't make me almost pass out. It's the little things, folks.

I definitely can't run. I tried. Bad decision. I'm hoping another week of rest, ice packs and painkillers will make it so I can get back to the gym next week. It's kind of driving me crazy that I can't work out.

For now, I'm limited to walking Allie four miles a day. In the meantime, there will be a lot of couch time with an ice pack planted on my ribs. Stretching it out seems to help, so there you go.

So interesting, I know.

Weight-Loss Update

For, like, a month there, it seemed like we were playing softball at least twice a week. You may be thinking, "oh hey! Lots of exercise! Nice!" And yes, that's true. But it also meant more beer and bar food than I'm usually accustomed to consuming. Aaaand it sort of led to a little more cheat meals than I'd like. But it's OK.

It was exactly as awesome as it sounds.

Thankfully, I'm holding steady at 194-195 pounds for now, which is a loss of 32-33 pounds since mid-April. I'll take it, man. I'll take it.

Today is all about rededicating to cutting out the nonsense food again, and as soon as I can get back in the gym, you better believe I'll be hitting it hard six days a week. For now, I'll just have to be satisfied with walking Allie four miles a day. It doesn't seem smart to try to work out with any kind of intensity with this rib stuff going on. Oh well. Soon!

The excellent news is I'm still on track to reach my goal of 180 pounds in the timetable I originally set back in April. The first couple of months went so well, so quickly, there was room for a bit of a plateau, even if it was more than a little self-induced. Just keep on, keepin' on, man. I'll get there. I know it.

Weekend Update

So I knew I liked Bottom Line, a bar downtown near Farragut Square. We'd gone there a few times during softball season, and it was my kind of place. I liked it immediately, in fact.

On Friday night, I met a bunch of friends there and discovered Bottom Line's ridiculous happy hour specials.

From 4 p.m. to 7 p.m., they have $1 Miller Light bottles. The price goes up to $2 from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m., and to $2.50 from 9 p.m. to 11 p.m. Pretty sure they go back to $1 at 11 p.m., too. That's incredible!

Got there a little before 6, so we got to take full advantage of the special price. It's just such a great place to waste some time. And, in case you missed it, $1 beers! From there, we headed to a place called Local 16, which is actually pretty close to my old Columbia Heights stomping grounds. Local 16 was all right and all, but two drinks there cost twice as much as the five I had at Bottom Line.

I know they were regularly priced for bars downtown, but I did not appreciate the juxtaposition haha. But there was a LOT more dancing at Local 16, and we all know how I feel about dancing. We left that place around 2 or so. By the time I got to sleep, it was nearing 5 a.m. Hey oh.

I went to sleep on Saturday morning the same time I woke up the Saturday morning before.

All of that goes to say most of Saturday was spent asleep. I walked the dog, ran a few errands and fell asleep. And it was magnificent. All in all, Friday was well worth it. Let's go.

Job Update

Still waiting to hear. As far as I know, I'm a finalist for the position I mentioned briefly over the past few weeks. I feel good, and I'm optimistic.

I think I may be hearing something in the next few days. C'moooon good news. I'm ready.

Football Update

Yes. So college football season is almost upon us, and a bunch of friends are planning a road trip to Boston for the N.C. State-Boston College game on Nov. 12. We first started discussing it during the ridiculous CAN softball tournament, and it seemed like such a great idea, so why not?

I've never been to Boston. Truthfully, I never imagined I'd ever go, nor did I particularly want to go, really. But whatevs. I've heard good things. I have a friend and a cousin who live there, and I have no doubt it will be awesome. I'm looking forward to it.

Plus, N.C. STATE FOOTBALL! Man, let's go.

Well that's still a pretty long post, but it's reasonable for me, I suppose. Until next time!

-BG

LET'S GO

I am on the cusp of good news. I can feel it. It's coming. Too much is going right for me right now for this not to come through.

First of all, I've weighed in two days in a row now at 195 pounds. Progress, my friends! That's 32 pounds down with 15 to 20 more to go. God I feel so good. I just can't even begin to express it.

Do me a favor and go to my Facebook page. First, stalk a few of my photos. Specifically, look at the ones from Christmas where I'm wearing my kick-ass abominable snowman shirt. And look at my Halloween photo where I'm dressed in a Yankees uniform.

Now, look at my latest profile picture, which was taken after a softball game this past Tuesday night. That's the first new picture I've seen of myself in a couple months. What a difference!! Jesus. Look how small I look! Wow.

I'd say I don't mean to brag, but I absolutely do mean to brag. Seeing visual evidence of progress is like a shot of pure adrenaline. All I want to do is kick even MORE ass now. Still work to do. Like I just said, I've got at least 15 or 20 more pounds to lose, and I really can't wait to get there. I feel so good. Wow.

What else is going on?

Well, tonight is the end-of-season party for our softball league where they'll announce the tournament seeds and pairings. Plus, it's $25 all you can eat/drink. Sold! Man, I hate that our season is already over. It went by so fast.

We have our league-wide tournament next weekend, but then we just have to wait for the next season to start. Well, that's not entirely true. I'm going to play flag football for the N.C. State team, too, and so are quite a few of the softball folks. But man I love me some softball haha.

Flag football will be pretty great, though. I've heard the State team has been around for a while and is actually quite good. Like I mentioned last week, I think a lot of our softball team's problems came because we had no continuity from last year. There was no team last year. I think we'll be much better next year now that we have a really great group of people to work with.

But the flag football team has been around for quite a few years and apparently regularly competes for the league title. That'll be fun.

And then Sunday is going to be fantastic. First, I'll be heading to Nats Park at noon for some pre-game pre-gaming, and then a 1:35 game against the Mets. Katie from softball decided she wanted to have a "Sunday Funday for No Good Reason." Well, I can get behind that. So I'll be heading down there with Katie and, like, 17 of her friends haha.

We'll buy the cheap $5 tickets and then just hang out at the huge bar in the outfield. LET'S GO!

Man I love going to Nats games. Plus! I'll get to see Jordan Zimmermann pitch. He's a really great young pitcher who sometimes gets lost in the Strasburgmania going on here. Zimmermann is legit though. In the next few years, if Strasburg can come back successfully and Zimmermann stays healthy, a 1-2 punch at the top of the rotation of Strasburg-Zimmermann will be pretty stout, man. Not bad at all.

The main event of the weekend, though, is 6:30 p.m. at the 9:30 Club downtown. REEL BIG FISH!! They are so much fun to see live. So much energy, such a great stage presence. Fun songs you can dance to, and since I know all the lyrics to all the songs, I will undoubtedly be screaming along, like you do.

I just can't wait haha. It's going to be a really great weekend.

Now, the impending good news about which I am extremely hopeful is I've advanced to the next stage with the company from last week. If you'll recall, I had a job interview last Monday, and they contacted me yesterday to invite me back for some more interviews and a writing test. Man, let's go.

So there you go. Almost everything is going right for me at the moment. If I can get this one more thing to go right -- wow. Jubilation.

The energy has been uncomfortably bottled up for more than four months now -- since I narrowly missed out after being a finalist for another position. I have to say, there's a chance I just spontaneously combust if/when I get the good news for which I'm hoping.

Bottom line: I feel good, man. Really good. Life is good. Good news is coming. I can feel it.

-BG

Patience is Overrated

It's been a trying several months. There's no other way to slice that one.

A couple of weeks ago, my friend Mike said to me, "Wow it just hit me. For basically all of the past six months, you've been just waiting for things to happen."

And yes. That's entirely true.

Between job searching, relationships, potential moving decisions and a few other things -- the past six months has been a series of situations where I LITERALLY cannot control what happens after a certain point. I do what I can do, and then I can only wait for the companies to get back to me, for others to make their decisions, for my apartment to tell me they've found someone to rent my place (thus kicking me out), etc.

It's actually kind of funny because if I had to point out a weakness of mine in the past, I'd probably eventually settle on how I tend to just roll with things. Sometimes, that's awesome. But sometimes, you have to just get up and make shit happen, you know?

I'd always been able to succeed by just rolling with the punches and going about my business. Now I've been in situations where I've been effectively forced to roll with the punches, and it's driving me fucking crazy.

Like, you have no idea.

I've always been extremely patient when it comes to my relationships with other people. And I've had no choice but to be patient and wait for these things to happen now.

I go on my interviews. I send my thank you notes. I follow-up later and make sure they have everything they need. But at some point, you simply cannot just keep contacting them. You have to let them go through their process.

Enter: patience.

Fuck some patience, man. I am ready to blow the fucking roof off of something. Anything. I don't mean that in an angry or negative way. I just mean I am ready to get up and make some shit happen.

I think that's one of the reasons why I've really thrown myself into this weight-loss and working out thing. I can't control much of my job search beyond sending out resumes and cover letters. But I for damn sure can get my ass into the gym and run and lift weights.

It's been one of the few things I've had complete control over lately. So I'm killing it. I've been fluctuating between 195 and 197 pounds the past couple of days, so that puts me almost 15 pounds away from my goal weight.

I am just so ready to get out there and really kick some serious ass at my next job. I am dying to make things happen on my own and not wait for them to happen to me now. I've been waiting for things to happen to me for six months, and I've had no other choice. I'm done with it.

And the really great thing about being 30-32 pounds lighter and having clothes fit better and more comfortably is I've LITERALLY never felt better about myself. Self-confidence and self-esteem are at all-time highs, and I will have absolutely no problem taking something by the horns and running with it.

I seriously cannot wait for the opportunity. I'm just so beyond excited for the chance to make shit happen and be done with this waiting game.

Let's go, man. Let's GO.

-BG

Accountability and Affirmation, baby Part 3

Milestone alert!!

So I know I said on Monday I was not going to mark the 197 as official because it fluctuated all weekend, etc.

But this is the third day in a row, so I'm going to go ahead and stamp it.

I HAVE LOST 30 POUNDS IN THREE MONTHS (!!!).

Three days in a row, I've weighed in at 197. Wow. Just a reminder: three months ago, on April 17, I weighed 227 pounds. Man, let's GO.

I've gotten a comment/question or two along the lines of: "Wow, you lost all that weight because of a break-up?"

Well, no. Not even close really. And here's why I think this is an important distinction: I did this for me. Not for someone else. Not because of someone else. If I didn't do this for myself, I'm not sure it would be sustainable. Using internal motivation rather than external motivation will lend itself to more permanence in the long run, no?

My "official" start-date for this was April 17, which is several, several weeks before the break-up in question. The bottom line is I looked at myself and was profoundly unhappy. And I knew I needed to change a lot of things for and about myself if I was ever going to be happy with myself.

And I am increasingly proud to say I have changed them. You'll have to pardon me if I repeat myself a little during this post, but I'm going to ramble and brag a little bit. You've been warned haha.

I can barely contain my excitement over how much better my clothes fit. There's this great Louis C.K. stand-up bit about how when you get fat, all your pants just hurt. You get bigger, but you don't buy new pants. You just keep forcing your increasingly fatter ass into the same pants, and it gets painful.

As I look back, well, yes that's true. I have this one specific pair of shorts, and it used to hurt to wear them just three months ago. I can now pull them on and off without unbuttoning them. I am epic win.

My belt? Three months ago, I was on the second-to-last hole from needing a bigger belt. Now? I'm on the last hole in the other direction! Another few weeks and I may need to buy a smaller belt. Good problems to have, folks. I am approaching the "I need to buy new pants" point in this. Good times.

OK, but seriously. Let's not get too far ahead of ourselves here. Getting down to 197 is wonderful, and I am super proud of that. But it is still considered overweight haha. I'm only 5'9" -- maybe I could pass for 5'10". Still have a ways to go, but progress for the win.

What has worked for me? Many of these things are common knowledge, but it's different when you actually, you know, listen to them.

-- You can't really overestimate how awesome jut a plain old can of tuna is. Just crack open the can and grab a fork. It's only 100 calories, but it's 20 grams of protein! I've taken to eating a can of tuna after lifting days in the gym because it's hard to beat that protein/calorie ratio. Plus, cans of tuna are only, like, a buck and super tasty. No mayo necessary!

-- Be obsessive. Seriously, write down everything you eat. I like to go to Noodles and Company from time to time because I really like their mac and cheese. Sometimes, I'll get a Dr. Pepper because I love Dr. Pepper. Well, you better be careful, because if you fill that 22-oz. cup just twice, you're talking almost 600 calories. There are almost as many calories in two cups of Dr. Pepper as in the entire bowl of mac and cheese. But how many of you would be like, "oh it's just a cup of Dr. Pepper. It can't be that bad."

It's not that bad if you record it and take it into account for your day's intake. It just means you can't go as crazy on dinner and snacks. That may be worth it to you. Sometimes it is for me because I just like Dr. Pepper. But 600 calories is no joke, and it's one of the reasons why sodas are so dangerous.

-- Force yourself into a habit. I don't even think about going to the gym anymore. I wake up. I walk Allie. I go to the gym. If it's Monday, Wednesday or Friday, I know I have to run between 3.5 and four miles. If it's Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday, I know it's a lifting day. There are some exceptions. I might not lift if I have a softball game because I don't want to overdo it and hurt myself. But otherwise. Get it done.

-- Buy a food scale!! Seriously, pay attention to what the serving size is on the back of the box. If you're just eyeballing some pasta, you are most definitely going to end up eating at least three servings. One serving of dry pasta is just noooot that much pasta. And again, there's nothing necessarily wrong with eating three servings of pasta as long as you take it into account for the day. But it's just another example of how extra calories can sneak into your diet if you're not careful.

Also, I love turkey sandwiches. It's easy to put too much turkey on a sandwich. Weigh it out!

-- Cheat meals can be extremely important to helping you stave off cheat days or even weeks. One of the things I know I must avoid is pizza. My inner fat kid cannot control himself around pizza. I'm like Ron Swanson when it comes to pizza. "Give me all the pizza you have. I worry what you just heard was give me a lot of pizza. What I said was give me all the pizza you have."

But man, I was excited about my job interview on Monday, and there's a pizza place downtown I happen to enjoy, so I got a couple slices. I didn't order a large pizza. I just ordered some slices. Self-control. I has it. Sometimes.

And it helped! I didn't gain any weight. I didn't have a setback. I just rewarded myself and moved on.

So there you go. Thirty pounds is a lot! I know I'm ready to dig in and go the remaining 17 pounds now to get to my goal weight.

Some of you may think it's weird that I write so much about weight-loss, but here's my thinking. A little public shame and accountability is a solid way to keep yourself from doing something stupid again. The more I talk about this, the more people know what a bad state I was in, the less I want to get back to that state. And if more people know, they're more likely to ask how it's going, and it's just a system of accountability to make sure I'm sticking to my plan. Make sense?

Plus, you guys have been so unbelievably supportive and encouraging, and man. That goes a long way, too. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has messaged me with supportive words. It means the world to me. It really does, and I'm blown away. Sincerely.

Looking ahead:

-- Softball tomorrow night against Penn State, and then a doubleheader on Saturday against Richmond and Cornell. Maaan can't WAIT.

-- And hopefully some news about Monday's interview in the next couple of days. We'll see how it goes!

I'm out!

-BG

Rambling

There's this really funny blog I read called 2Birds1Blog. The main writer is a girl named Meg who actually lives in DC. I've seen her around once or twice, too. I highly recommend checking out the blog. She writes it with a guy named Chris, and they just signed a book deal largely due to their writing on the blog. So you know. I'm available.

The funny thing is I started reading that blog several months before I moved to DC. Then as things started turning and I ended up taking a job here, I emailed Meg for advice on where to live, and she was super helpful about it all.

Anyway, she does this thing from time to time called "Thoughts I Couldn't Flesh Out into a Full Entry." Pretty self-explanatory, I would think.

And this is sort of my version of that. I don't have one thing I want to talk about today, but there are a few that are worthy of a couple paragraphs. And we're off!

Weight-Loss FTW

I'm still trucking! I weighed in at one point this weekend at 197, which is a loss of 30 pounds (!!). But I'm not going to mark that as official because I fluctuated between 197 and 202 all weekend haha. Still at 199 this morning. Still super pumped about that.

My belt is going to be on it's way out soon though. I just noticed I am now using the last hole on this belt. Ha! Love it.

The most exciting thing about this whole "I'm getting in ridiculous shape" thing is putting on clothes I was too embarrassed to wear not that long ago. Except they fit perfectly now.

One of the things that really clued me into my weight gain was when I started going on job interviews back in the late winter and early spring. I started putting on my nice dress shirts and ties and noticed they were getting uncomfortably tight around my neck and my chest and arms too. Not good times.

Today? GREAT SUCCESS. Room to spare in the neck. No tugging and pulling in the chest area. That's what she said? I'll allow it.

And then of course I was three belt holes away from where I was back then. I said goddamn it feels good to be a gangsta.

Job Interview!

I had one today! It was a PR firm downtown, and it's a really exciting opportunity. The job listing is a solid mix of things I like to do, things I do well and things I really want to do in the future. I will not disclose details. I will gladly discuss them with you if you want to IM me on one of the several platforms I use!

I think it went well, and I'm optimistic, as ever. I will say that.

METRO WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME

Obviously, I ride the Metro to get downtown. I don't care to mess with the DC traffic, which never, ever seems to let up. I was once stuck in DC traffic at midnight. Midnight!

So. Knowing my interview was at 11:30 this morning, I was up and ready to go by 7 a.m. I was obsessively checking Metro's website and Twitter feed for information on any possible delays. Seeing none, I relaxed a little. The scheduled time for the interview meant I wouldn't need to travel during prime rush hour.

When I'm not trying to get downtown during rush hour, I can make it door-to-door from my apartment to anywhere downtown in just under an hour usually. Maybe right at an hour if I have to walk a lot.

Seeing no delays anywhere in the Metro system, I left my apartment at 10, which put me at the station around 10:15. I should get downtown by 11 at the latest -- 30 minutes early for my interview. Plenty of time.

Well I get to the station. No trains. The first two trains that show up are out of service for God knows why. Finally get on a train. We don't move for 20 minutes. (!!!)

No announcements. No updates to the website or Twitter feed. Nothing.

We finally get moving, and it's a slow trip. We get to the first station in DC (Friendship Heights), and the train stops moving just before the platform.

Stalled. Nothing. Sounds I'd never heard in two years of riding the Metro. Nothing good, that's for sure. Then we pull up to the platform. "This train is out of service."

Are you serious.

Thank GOD I planned enough time to get there 30 minutes early or else I'd have been screwed. I got off the train, and I knew I couldn't afford to wait on another train, so I ran upstairs to the street and got some cash. Fortune smiled upon me as a cab was driving by right as I ran out of the bank with my hand up.

"Mr. Cabbie, I don't want you to get arrested on account of me, but Metro has screwed me over big time today, and I have a job interview very, very soon."

We made it from Friendship Heights to Dupont in less than 10 minutes. This man was incredible. I think I gave him a $10 tip. Worth. It.

Apartment News!

The apartment people finally agreed to work with me. As I outlined a week or two ago, I was about to move back to Charlotte temporarily at the end of this month. I'd come back when I found a job, etc.

When I gave them my notice back in June, I talked to a guy I didn't know and who didn't know me. I explained the situation, and I was like, can you work with me at all on this? He said he couldn't. They had to market my apartment equally with the others that were available.

Well I went into the office today to ask if they'd found a taker for my apartment for two weeks from now (gulp). I was decidedly dreading the answer. To my great delight, they have not found a taker. So I decided to bump my notice up two weeks to give me until August 15. Thankfully, the person I talked to is someone who knew me.

She was like, oh don't worry, I know you, I know your dog, I've seen you walking her and I've seen you in the gym. We'll work with you. We'll make sure to show other apartments before yours as long as you let us know as soon as you know something. AGREED.

So I'm here for another month, instead of two weeks. That gives me time to see this last job lead through to the end, and then make a decision. If I get it, great. I'll sign a lease and be done with this nonsense. If I don't, I'll probably take a break from applying and just devote my time to moving back to Charlotte and just do THAT right.

I'll get home and settle in, and then I'll start applying to jobs up here again. But that's just the last resort. Fingers crossed this one will come through. It seems like a really, really great job, and I'd love the chance.

Anyway, I'm out for now. Questions? Concerns? Comments? You know where to find me!

-BG

Looking Ahead

Quite a busy few days looming ahead here. And it's all over the place, too.

Allow me to take a stroll through the next several days and check out what's going on. And yes, this post is as much for my organization and sanity as it is for entertainment. Whatevs.

Friday (today!)

OK, not a whole lot going on today. I'm mostly taking it easy after last night. That's the funny thing with age. It doesn't necessarily prevent you from going out and having as much as you used to, but it definitely takes an extra minute or two to get back to life again...haha.

But yeah, last night was a softball game followed by the customary trip to our bar afterward. The game started off rough. We were down TWO players at the start of the game. Illinois had to let us borrow someone to play catcher, and we were missing an outfielder, so there were plenty of gaps out there.

They ended up scoring 13 runs in the first two innings. Ridiculous! We outscored them something like 5-2 once our full team showed up, but lost 15-8 I think.

Anyway, we kicked some serious ass at flip-cup afterward. Indiana's team challenged us, and we immediately won the first seven rounds we played. I think the final tally was 9-3 or 10-3? Domination, son!

In other Friday news, my future wife Hope Solo will be the guest on PTI today, so I'm pretty pumped about that. And the big news tonight is the 90-minute series finale for Friday Night Lights.

A lot of people I talk to are so skeptical of FNL. "Oh that high school football show?" Well, yes. It has some high school football, but it's mostly about this coach and his family and the kids on his teams and their relationships and the unbelievable roller coaster of emotions small-town football puts them through.

Seriously, it has some of the best writing and acting I've ever, ever seen on a television show (aside from a particularly ridiculous story line in season 2). The majority of the shows five seasons have been as good as television should be and can be. I am simultaneously excited and depressed about tonight's finale.

I believe the show is on Netflix Instant at the moment, and it is so worth your time to check it out. I promise. Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose. So good.

Saturday

Saturday I will go running. Because I most definitely did not go running today...haha. I didn't wake up with a hangover, but I felt it would be unwise to push my luck on that front.

I've got a LOT of shit to do around my apartment because it's about time to start preparations for a temporary move to Charlotte. I really hope it doesn't come to that, but what can you do? I will do what I do: roll with it and make the best of it.

And kind of an ongoing thing for the next week or so is I'm going to be one of two acting coaches for the softball team while our main coach is out of town. For the win!

But what that means is all I'm going to do is think about the team for the next week (which includes three games). It reminds of the time in grad school when Clark went out of town for the summer, and I served as the sports editor for Technician for the summer.

The paper only published once a week in the summers, but I LITERALLY thought of nothing else all day every day. Every single day it was, "oh god what stories will I run this week." "What stories can I write this week." "Who is around to write stories this week." I'm getting anxious just thinking about how anxious I was running the section for the summer. Ha.

I seriously could not imagine being the full-time sports editor during the semester when we published Monday through Friday.

Anyway. Judging by the weather forecast this weekend, I will be spending most of it outside. Great success.

Sunday

Big TV day on Sunday, I gotta say.

I'll probably hit up some church after walking Allie in the morning. But oh boy is there ever some shit to watch.

First we have the Women's World Cup final going on with the U.S. vs. Japan. I wrote about my feelings on the U.S. women's national team on Wednesday. I can't wait to watch this game. Let's go, ladies. Kick some ass.

And then Sunday night is the season 4 premiere of Breaking Bad, which is maybe the best show currently airing on television. Top notch, man.

It's also really easy to catch up on it if you haven't been watching. The first season is only seven episodes, and seasons two and three are only 13 episodes each. There's nothing I can say that will do the show justice. It is just amazingly done in every aspect, and I am so, so excited about its return.

Monday

So what's up on Monday? Oh yeah! Job interview downtown! Again, zero percent chance I name the company here, but you know. There it is. I feel good about how the phone interview went last week, and I like the company and the work they do.

When you combine that with how good I've been feeling over the past couple of weeks -- I mean, my confidence is at an all-time high because of my kick-ass weight loss, and I've had a much greater positive outlook lately than before.

Shit's just good, man. This could be it. But I need to get down there and talk to them and see how it goes before I really get excited. I'm just happy to have another opportunity. LET'S GO!

Well that's the next few days. Thursday, we're playing Penn State in softball, and then Saturday we have a doubleheader with Cornell and Richmond. CAN'T WAIT!

I will be working with Evan to set the line-ups and run the games, and I couldn't be more excited. It really is irrational how much I love playing in this damn softball league haha. Whatevs!

Questions? Comments? LET ME KNOOOOW!

And only like six people will understand why I wrote that phrase the way I wrote it. Ha. I'm going for mass appeal here, folks.

I'm out!

-BG

Weekend Update!

I know I missed a post on Friday. That's my bad. I was actually in the process of writing a post that I planned on putting up just before I left to go downtown for my softball game.

It stormed something serious Friday afternoon though. I was planning on leaving to go to the game around 4:30ish, so I was writing feverishly to get it posted before I left.

The problem with writing quickly is the autosave doesn't catch as much as if I take my time and add a little here and there. I'm usually pretty good about stopping to save pretty frequently while I'm writing, but I was just trying to finish so I could leave.

Then the power went out.

It came back a few minutes later, but when I logged back in to Blogger, most of my post had not saved. I got so disgusted that I just closed the window and left for the game. I'm sure you know what that's like. You write so much, and then something happens and you lose it. You just get frustrated and don't even want to finish.

Well that's what happened on Friday.

Anyway, since I wrote you a novel on Wednesday when I described how watching (500) Days of Summer, like, 15 times can help put some perspective on a break-up (which I went through not too long ago), I figured I would keep it short and sweet today.

So here's a brief, general life update.

The past week has been pretty busy with working out and job interviews. Excellent news there, that's for sure.

I'm now going through the process with three more places, which I will not name here for fear of Google's revenge. Two are PR firms downtown and the third is a place not too far from my apartment. I feel good about all three initial interviews, and they all are still interested, so we'll see how it goes.

On the health and fitness front, I still ran and lifted last week, but I backed off the intensity a little bit on account of a ridiculously sore muscle in my back. That seems to have paid off since I'm no longer feeling any discomfort. Today, I went right back to it. I upped my distance to 3.5 miles today in an effort to work up to running four miles a day on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, starting next week.

HOWEVAH. If you've been keeping up with my progress, you know I've lost 25 pounds over the past few months. And now, the really super excellent news is after running and walking Allie today, I stepped on the scale and saw 199.5!! Now, I know that was some water weight, but I haven't seen under 200 on the scale in two years. Feels good, man. Feels good.

Won't be too much longer before I'm back under 200 for good. Let's go.

In other news, the softball game I was so excited about on Friday ended up being rained out anyway. Fail. We haven't had a game in a month! And the cruel thing is the long lay-off came after our first win of the season, which has no doubt killed off the momentum we managed to collect in our 20-4 ass-beating of South Carolina.

In true N.C. State fashion, we can't even win right. *sigh.

Oh well. We still met up at our bar to hang out. After games, the bar has $10 pitchers, but for rainouts, they do $8 pitchers. So that was great. I easily killed about a pitcher and a half of beer. And then, I have to say. Evan, you sir are a dangerous man with your affinity for shots of Jameson.

That didn't stop me from having two of them, but my God. I swear I could still taste the Jameson on Sunday night. The metro ride home Friday night is by far the closest I've ever come to breaking my streak.

I was pretty convinced I was going to need to get off the train at one point. And then I had to cab home from the metro station at like 1:30 a.m., and then cab back the next day to get my car. Good lord.

Sunday was pretty great. I went to the Nats/Rockies game with a friend from the softball team. The Nats lost, which is the first time in six years that the team I was rooting for lost a baseball game I've attended. But the Rockies pitcher Ubaldo Jimenez was absolutely dealing. He had a perfect game heading into the fifth inning!

I was actually kind of disappointed when the Nats broke it up in the bottom of the fifth because I would have loved to see history like that. Anyway, the Nats ended up losing 2-1, and we headed out to a bar for the rest of the night.

I was most decidedly taking it easy after Friday night because oh my God no thank you. But it was a good time. It's always good to get out of the apartment, you know?

Sunday was all about some rest. And the U.S. women's soccer team. Because holy shit. What a win, man. And also, Hope Solo. Yes, ma'am. Marry me immediately. She's pretty kick ass.

Anyway, brief update and all, so I'm out. Softball game on Thursday at 6 p.m. at 14th St. and Constitution! Come watch us hopefully kick some ass!

-BG

The Incredible Shrinking Brian

It's the little victories that make it fun to keep going. And, really, sometimes they aren't even that little. Today is the first real significant milestone, I think. Sometimes, I really do just want to order pizza or go to Taco Bell. But man. Days like today. Makes it worth it. It really does.

I weighed in today at 202 pounds. I started at 227 almost three months ago, and my goal to reach is 180 pounds. What does that mean? Well, it means I set out to lose 47 pounds, and I've lost more than half of that now.

That's right. I'm down 25 pounds, with 22 left to lose. I've crossed the half-way point of the race, and it's all downhill from here. From this point on, I will always have less to lose than I've already lost.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

Not only that, but this weekend I put on khakis and a button-down shirt that, just a few months ago, well, let's just say I was, unfortunately, straining the threads and buttons. This weekend, however, I could pull the khakis on and off without unbuttoning them, and the shirt was comfortable again, and -- dare I say -- I think it looked pretty good compared to how it used to look on me.

I mean. Let's GO. Let us go.

Also, and this is pretty shameful and embarrassing. But, you know, I write a blog that's mostly about myself, so how much shame can I really have? That's right; not that much. And besides, it's all about some accountability for the nonsense that got me into this in the first place, right?

In the winter, it got so bad I had trouble bending over to put my socks on. Seriously. I sit down on the couch, and I lean over my leg and pull my sock on. Seems easy enough.

Except I couldn't. I could not comfortably lean over and put on my socks. I mean, what the fuck, man?

Isn't it crazy how you can look back on yourself from a time not that long ago and just marvel at the mindset you had and the things you did? Christ, man. What in the shit was I doing to myself? I really wish I could go back in time and punch myself right in the face.

But! I say all that because it's in the past! That is obviously no longer a problem, but this weekend was the first time where I really thought about it.

I took a few progress pictures, and I can see some changes. Nothing I feel comfortable showing others just yet, but eventually, maybe I will. It's only been a couple of weeks since I moved into this new belt hole. It's starting to be a little loose though!

I'm maybe another couple of weeks from moving to another new belt hole. And believe me when I say I LITERALLY have no memory of ever having to use a belt hole that far back. Not since undergrad at least. So, like seven to 10 years ago. (Sidenote: Undergrad was that long ago? Punch me in the face. Jesus.)

I did decide to skip running today. I've been having a little soreness in a muscle on my upper back since Thursday, and it actually got really aggravated when I ran on Friday. It feels better today than it did on Friday, but I don't want to push it and risk making it worse. Especially since I still walk Allie four miles every day. It's not like I'm not getting any exercise if I don't run. All the same, I hope to get back to it on Wednesday.

Otherwise, running has been going great. I'm sticking to the treadmill still for health reasons. It's almost assuredly a mental issue at this point, but I'm just terrified of running outside and having my knee or hamstring hurt to the point that I can't run at all for a while. I can't have that. Not when I'm making so much progress and feeling so good.

So treadmill it is because I feel comfortable on it. Anyway, I've been running 5Ks on the treadmill three times a week, and I've gotten my time down to around 28 minutes. And yeah, that's not a fantastic 5K time, but consider this: I ran an actual 5K last September in around 32 minutes, and I could barely run two miles on the treadmill a couple months ago.

Like I said, it's the little victories.

And we have a softball game this Friday! And depending on the next couple of weeks, I could be heading to the beach with my family at the end of July, into the beginning of August. And then I might actually be able to hit up the Technician reunion at the beach on August 7. In the meantime, I'm sticking to the plan.

It just feels so good to work so hard at something and actually achieve some results. I remember when I first saw the 227 on the scale -- ugh, and just despairing at how difficult it was going to be to change it. Here I am now almost three months later and 25 pounds lighter.

Trust me when I tell you this: it is so, so worth it. It's worth cutting out the food you've grown accustomed to eating -- all the shitty food we all love so much: the pizza and burgers and cookies and doughnuts and enormous plates of pasta. It's worth waking up a little earlier and sweating it out in the gym. It's worth everything. And it makes me want to work that much harder to get the rest of the way.

That's really the key, too. It's hard work. There's no easy way. If you find an "easy" way to lose the weight, it's almost definitely unhealthy, and it almost definitely means the weight will eventually come back. It is far more rewarding to do it the right way. I haven't been less than 200 pounds in almost two years, and I'm probably two weeks away from it again. CAN'T WAIT.

Goddamn life is good, man. Life is good.

LET'S GO.

-BG

Uncertainty is Afoot

As many of you know, I have been without a job for a few months now. If you don't know, there it is. It's all good. I'm hanging in there, and things are pretty awesome, considering.

I can't even count the number of interviews I've had. Well that's not true. I can count them. I've been on 14 or 15 interviews.

And listen, I know I should be grateful about even getting the interviews. And I am! Don't get me wrong. You never know what an interview might lead to in the future even if it doesn't lead to a job immediately. Plus, a lot of people don't even get interviews.

I get all that. I am grateful. But at the end of the day, an interview without a job offer is still a lack of a paycheck. But like I said earlier, it's all good. Financially, I've been fine. I've tightened things up, of course, but I had a plan and I stuck to it. And I have a plan going forward as well.

I've been a finalist a couple of times. I've gotten pretty far a couple of other times. I'm honestly not worried about it. I'm working hard on finding a new gig, and it's going to happen.

Here's the tricky part, though. At the end of July, it becomes fiscally irresponsible for me to continue renting my apartment. My apartment complex requires a two-month move-out notice.

I gave my notice to evacuate my apartment a few weeks ago. I explained the situation, and they said if I find a job I can cancel the notice. But! They have to market the apartment as available. If they agree to rent my apartment out before I find a job, I am -- I believe the technical term is -- screwed.

For those following along at home, here's what that means (and, for that matter, if you're looking for evidence about how ass-backwards my 2011 has been, look no further): there now exists a scenario where I find a job and then become homeless (!).

You can't make this stuff up, folks!

My contingency in case I don't find something before the end of July is to move back to Charlotte temporarily. I will continue to look for jobs in D.C. and move back here when I find one. The fact is this is where I want to be now. I really love living here.

It took me two years, but I've finally put down roots here. Plus, hello; it's a pretty awesome place to live. Never mind the wow-factor of living in the nation's capital, which is significant. It's centrally located to almost everything I want to be near. I can be in Charlotte in six or seven hours. I can be in Raleigh in four or five. I can be in New Jersey in four hours.

Also, I've done the backwoods thing. I've lived in a small southern town. It was charming. Really, it was. But I don't think this is a secret: I'm a city guy. I just am. And D.C. is a great city for me because it's big enough to be a real city, but it's not so big it's overwhelming. It's a knowable city.

Don't get me wrong. New York is absolutely my favorite city in the U.S. It's not even really close. And who knows, maybe I'll even live there one day. But for now, this is for me.

And there are a ton of jobs here. So that can't be overlooked.

But I've got a couple of really promising leads going on right now, and I remain hopeful and optimistic one of them will come through before I have to go to Charlotte or vacate my apartment. It's all good!

Bottom line is this: don't worry about me! I am feeling so, so good. I remain, as ever, totally optimistic that things will work out, but prepared in case they don't. Uncertainty is afoot for me right now, but it will be fine. You know how I roll. I take it as it comes, and I am undeterred.

Besides, all the free time I've had has led to me getting in the best shape of my life; it's led to me writing more; it's led to me playing my guitar more; it's led to me eventually finding my softball team and making some truly awesome friends.

And I wouldn't have been able to go on my nine-day happy bender otherwise. It's the little things.

So yeah. That's all I've got for now.

I'm actually really excited about this blog. I mapped out post ideas that should take me through the rest of the summer. I'm excited to write again. This feels really, really good. Thank you so very much to everyone who reads, and please let me know if you want to know anything! I am, as always, an open book. Plus, Google Analytics tells me more people want to read this blog when I write about myself. So there you go. I can do that.

Check back every Monday, Wednesday and Friday (unless otherwise noted) for new posts. And spread the word!

-BG

Recovery, Accountability and Affirmation, baby

OK look. I'm not going to say I was on a bender. I think a bender requires a certain negative, down-in-the-dumps mental state. I was decidedly the opposite of that the entire time.

This was entirely a celebration of my birthday and of seeing friends and family I haven't seen in a long time and of just generally being young and alive.

But the nine-day period from Friday, June 17 through Saturday, June 25 -- whew. I do believe that's as close as I'll ever come to a bender.

Two ridiculous nights in Savannah (if you missed it, read all about it in my three-part Savannah story: Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.). A night with two old college friends, Tanner and Clark. My birthday with my best friend Jon and his girlfriend, which most decidedly earned a place on the Swanson Pyramid of Greatness. And then a ridiculous Saturday night, partying with one of my newest friends for her birthday (and mine, as she excitedly told almost everyone, leading to many shots [Thanks, Katie haha]). Five nights out of nine were spent drunk. Before last night, I hadn't had more than five or six hours of sleep per night in two weeks. I mean. I didn't even do that in college. It couldn't have been more awesome though.

A quick word about Saturday night before I move on to my fitness update.

Mike is a a friend of Katie's who I met for the first time Saturday night, and he was absolutely raving about this shot combo he loves. You take a shot of Jameson whiskey and chase it with a shot of pickle juice. Yes, you read that right. And yes, it sounds like a nightmare.

It wasn't long before he was tapping Katie and me on the shoulder and holding Jameson and pickle juice. Well then. Here we go. I have to say, it was not nearly as terrible as I thought it was going to be. The pickle juice immediately canceled out the burn of the Jameson. But then I just tasted pickles for a while afterward. Other drinks cleared that up eventually, but you know. Pickles.

Without question, the best part of the night was the dancing. Ask my cousins or my brother. I was just itching to dance the entire weekend in Savannah, but there was never really an outlet for it. The dueling piano bar was promising, but it just didn't work for me.

Saturday night, however. Man. Let's go. They played a solid mix of hip hop and 80s and terrible pop songs, and it just happened.

I know three things:

1. I almost assuredly make a fool out of myself when I'm dancing.
2. When I get a little drunk, I cannot stop myself from dancing.
3. I care not at all that I look a little foolish.

I have to say, it was awesome. They absolutely had me at "Take Me Home Tonight."

The night ended with me falling asleep on the Metro, and eating a double Quarterpounder and fries from McDonald's at 4 a.m. So, like I said, that night closed out a nine-day span that's as close as I'll ever get to a bender.

But it was a fun, happy bender. So there's that.

Now, after spending three days in Savannah and six days in Charlotte, I was expecting my little weight-loss odyssey to hit a speed bump. I ran exactly once -- the day before I went to Savannah. And I most definitely did NOT really keep track of what I was eating. And then, oh yeah, I drank, like, a million drinks.

After Saturday night, I knew nothing of note was going to happen on Sunday. I ran a few errands that needed running after being out of town for 10 days. I walked to Jersey Mike's (great success!), and then I collapsed on the couch for the remainder of the day, only leaving to take the dog on the second of our twice-daily two-mile walks. It was magnificent after so many days in a row of GO GO GO GO GO.

Today was going to be the day I got back to it. I walked the dog, then I went to the gym to run. I was ready for the run to be rough. Like, really rough. Yes, I run on a treadmill. But that's because it's easy on my knees, and I don't like running in the heat. So whatever. I usually just get on and run 30 or 35 minutes on speed 6, which is a 10-minute mile pace. Nothing crazy.

As soon as I started, I could feel it was going to be a good one. I always start off the run with "The Distance" by Cake. I felt completely energized. I was cruising. I pumped it up to 6.5 around the two-mile mark. At 2.5 miles, "Knights of Cydonia" came on. If there weren't other people in the gym, I would have probably yelled in excitement. It has a perfect, driving drum beat. Just exactly what you want to hear when you're running. So great.

I pushed it up to speed 7.5 for the last half mile because of the song, and I was rolling, man. I made it to 31 minutes straight, and then walked a four-minute cool down. I felt so, so great. I was expecting a day where I ran a mile and a half, walked for a few minutes and then ran another mile and a half or so. This blew me away.

I hadn't weighed myself yet because I was afraid to, honestly. If you were keeping track, before I went to Charlotte and Savannah, I'd made it down to 206 from 227. 21 pounds! I fully expected to see a 210 or a 212 or 214 on the scale today.

I got home from my run, stretched and got ready for my shower. I got on the scale. 205.5!!

What the shit!

I'm fully aware I lost a good bit of water weight running on a treadmill for 35 minutes, but that number still means I did not gain any significant weight over the past 10 days. Color me floored.

So that's where I'm at now. It's almost July, so I'll take some more progress pictures with no intention of posting them publicly just yet. My short-term goal is to be less than 200 pounds by the end of July, but I'm just going to keep on working, and we'll see what happens.

For now, I'm happily standing at 205.5, which has contributed greatly to me being happier than I've been in years. I just need to make sure I get out there soon to dance again. And! Softball game soon! Less than two weeks!

Nick, if you were here, I would pound my chest, yell "MAN LET'S GO" and then chest bump you. Goddamn I feel good.

Let us go.

-BG